Never Give Up: Show Your Children That Goals Are Achievable

article by Cindy G. Foust

Happy New Year to the nation that has listened to me ramble and roll for the past 11 years. What a thrilling accomplishment to have spent the last 132 months with you friends. I think I can safely refer to our friendship now that we’ve spent all this time together, right? Well, all 3 of you out there reading my column. That’s not really true, many of my readers reach out to me with comments and feedback and have for years, and I am very grateful because it actually helps me become a better writer. Speaking of being a better writer, I am thrilled to let you know, and I don’t think Cassie would mind me using this platform for this one comment, but I will be finally moving the last six books of my alphabet-based series into production right after the first of the year. Yep, readers, it’s finally happening and it couldn’t be more timely for my column on goal setting and realizing your dreams.

You see, my dream actually started 20 years ago…well, perhaps a little bit before that, as I have been writing since I was in college (in a black speckled book with a pencil mind you, but I digress). So for 20 years, I have dreamt of the day when I would finish my series and have for market an entire children’s book series, that is loosely based on my life. Or someone’s life that is in my tribe…really anyone is fair game. Some of you may not know this, but I kept those stories closely guarded until I would use them for character building lessons for my young readers. Some of those books…those lessons…were hard to write about, particularly my “M” book, Melanie Mouse, It’s a Very Sad Day at Our House. This book, friends, is about the loss of my beloved son, and how Scott and I tried to navigate through that loss with our oldest son. Hard, yes? But that book has been used many times to minister to young children who were experiencing similar grief like circumstances so for me, it’s what being a writer for children is all about.

So here I am, on the cusp of 2024, at the 20-year anniversary of my first book being published, on the cusp of releasing my 26th book. I’ve been thinking lately a lot about goal setting, not really resolutions, but actual goal setting and I realized that I had maybe let my kids down in this parenting department. For years, I would talk about goals with them, the importance of setting them and then working towards them. But what did I do to reinforce that or demonstrate that I was putting my money where my mouth is. Anybody with me on this? Now, for the record, it doesn’t seem to have harmed their psyche too much…both of my kids have set their share of goals…some they’ve attained, some they haven’t, but I don’t remember a time I sat down and helped them write them out for the upcoming year. Kind of sounds like a resolution, doesn’t it? For me, goal setting has always been hard because quite frankly, the one I set for myself, my ride or die one has been finishing my books series. I mean, of course I want to lose 20 pounds and have ultra-tight flawless skin, and maybe go to Rome…those are goals right? But what I really want to do, is finish this series so I can show my kids…you just can’t give up on your dreams. You can’t. If you dream it and you want it, you can have it. 20 years for me with multiple setbacks is proof that dreams are possible, dreams are real and we have to have them. Is there a difference in a dream and a goal? Heck, I don’t know, but for me, thinking I would publish 26 books might have been a little ambitious (insert eye roll here). But as I worked through my thoughts for this column, it dawned on me that maybe, just this one time, I could relish in the fact that my kids will “notice” that their mom finished something she started. That sounds goal oriented, right? I think as parents, showing our kids through our own words and actions is just as profound and compelling as sitting down with a piece of paper and writing them out. I want my kids to see their mom start something that has such high meaning and importance to her and see it through to the finish line (hey, I might have done that with getting my Masters last year at 56 years old, too, but this isn’t about me). And here I am…putting it in print, at my 20-year anniversary.

What I hope you take away from this readers, because I rarely “toot my own horn” so to speak, is the lesson as a parent, that no matter what you do start, what goal you set, what resolution you start, your children need to see you working towards it, no matter how long it takes. For me…that translates to two decades and still sitting in disbelief that it’s happening. But it is and I am here to say that I feel like someone has lifted a Buick off my chest.

What says you, readers, about this month’s column? What are some of your plans, your goals, your dreams? Do you discuss them with your kids? Or better than that, do they see you actively pursuing them? It is the end of an era for me, but such a momentous time all the same, and even though my children are grown-ups now, I plan to have this very talk with them once the books finally leave the station. Yeehaw…good riddance and happy trails to me…get to it with yours readers and include your children in your dreams. Let them be part of those dreams, my children (and husband) certainly have been part of mine. I’m starting 2024 with a grateful, full heart and I wish for you and your families the same influence, the same gratitude for the coming year.

Cindy G. Foust is a wife, mom, author and blogger. You can find her blog at the alphabetmom.com for weekly columns about home life,  parenting, small business stories and insight with a smidgen of literacy. Give her a like or follow on Facebook and Instagram.