Family is Family

No Matter Where You Are

article by Cindy G. Foust

Happy August BayouLife friends and family as we continue our pilgrimage through this pandemic crisis. Anyone else growing their own food and stockpiling toilet paper in preparation for the apocalypse? Just kidding…my daughter and I have a small herb garden on the patio but I really don’t think basil and mint will be much in the way of sustenance should we all find ourselves in a bunker with a crash helmet. Right?

These times are in a word, extraordinary, this much we know, so I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to write about (again) this month. When doing my clinical research (I know, insert eye roll here), I came across a lot of different ideas for an “August Blog Post,” you know things that I would “normally” write about… you know, because things are really “normal” right now.

For instance, I might “normally” write about helping your FAMILY plan a trip to Disney. As much as I love Disneyworld, and forgive me travel agents and Disneyworld personnel, but I’m a little reluctant to get in the boat on Splash Mountain with 100 other sweaty people… I don’t really care if the plane tickets are only $12. Or maybe I would “normally” write about hosting an outside FAMILY summer party… I mean, we can surely social distance outside. Except it is 100 degrees and feels like 150, so yeah… that would be such an epic fun party. Unless of course, everyone got in the pool and stayed six feet apart. But MY family and friends can’t “unsee” me in my bikini, so that’s a “no-go” at my house, for sure. Just kidding… I don’t have a bikini, I have a “truck-inki” which is a covering you use when you want to cover your truck. It’s a new thing I’m inventing, so look for it on the internet.

Or perhaps I would “normally” write to encourage your FAMILY to start a journal where you write and document your favorite memories from summer. Wait. Does anybody out there have any favorite memories of this summer?

And we all know what a fashion influencer I am, so there is an outside chance (very outside) that I would “normally” write about hot summer trends and all things fashion. Right? It could happen. But is anyone going anywhere to wear the cute denim Daisy Dukes I just ordered?

And a final topic, and one I have written about before, so it would be “normal” for me to offer different ideas to keep your kids from getting bored this summer. Wait. Parents can’t help their kids beat boredom when we are more bored than our kids, right?

As I was combing through the internet searching for inspiration or at the very least, praying for some motivation that would help me connect my column to our food issue, I got to thinking about this whole “normal” mentality. In all the articles I read and all the websites I visited and through all the Pinterest pages I clicked on, I never saw anything that suggested that we “just be still” or “chill out for just a cotton picking minute.” But is that “normal” behavior for us? To just chill-axe?

I got to thinking about my own childhood and early teen years, and what the “norm” for us was, and let me tell you, there was no Pinterest posts to help my parents “keep us busy” or offer up “boredom busters.” Nope, we were just expected to make our own fun… to entertain ourselves… to come up with our own entertainment. By the way, these expectations were all without the help of 587 television stations, an Xbox and Netflix. Oh, and YouTube…can’t forget that one. And while some folks might dispute this next fact, I think we all turned out okay, even “normal” …if you would.

Also, when I was growing up, we didn’t take elaborate vacations. My dad worked overseas 30 days at a time, so when he came home, he wanted to STAY home. Although we did get to go to Six Flags Over Texas sometimes and we thought we were the Godrocks family (whoever that is, but Mr. Harkey always compared prosperous people to the Godrocks so they must have been important and rich.)

Yes, we would pile in the Chevy Cindy Citation (I would inherit it years later when I got my license) and head to Arlington for food, fun and fellowship. We were packed in there like sardines but we didn’t even argue or care because we were headed to ride the Judge Roy Scream and eat a “pink thing.” Oh, and take vintage saloon pictures. Wait. Does anyone care about my childhood vacations?

Sorry, I tend to #TBT sometimes and I take y’all with me, whether you want to go or not. The original point of this hot mess express column is this: even if you don’t get to take your FAMILY on a Disney cruise this summer; even if your kids don’t get to go to their great camps; even if your summer camping trip gets postponed… wait… does anyone really camp in the summer? When the heat index is 150 and mosquitoes are the size of a Buick?

Back to the point, back to the point… even if you feel stuck in quicksand and like you are drowning in despair… I would challenge you to remember this… family is family no matter where you are. The lack of a destination vacation can’t change that. Our homes should be our epicenters and our children’s livelihoods should be our priority, right?

Maya Angelou, a wonderful American poet, said it best, “I sustain myself with the love of family.” Let that sink in for a minute…your family is a gift, a priceless and treasured gift, and no pandemic, no virus can change that, no matter how your “normal” has been affected.

Social media is full (I really should capitalize that word so you can hear me screaming) with so much negativity and worry and division that I can hardly bear to get on it… in fact, to borrow a quote from my good friend, Allison, “I’ve found myself divorcing it for a while.” So many people are consumed with getting back to “normal” and don’t get me wrong… I sit and think about the old “normal” versus the new “normal” just like everyone else.

And I grieve for family and friends afflicted with COVID; I grieve for businesses struggling to right the ship; I miss my work, church and social life day-to-day interactions; I miss being with my FAMILY every weekend and helping my mom put up jelly. And if I’m truthful and I always try to be with my readers, I have to really work on my own negativity and pessimism and how it might be affecting my children, just like everyone else. It’s real and it can be paralyzing.

But the real truth is, I still have my FAMILY, and we are all safe and healthy. We are living our lives in our epicenter, different for sure, but we are “sustaining” one another as we navigate this uncertain time. Negativity and pessimism will certainly continue to creep in but I have every confidence that our great nation will endure; this virus will be cured; and our “normal” routines will be restored.

In the meantime, continue working to make positivity a priority and keep that vibe in your epicenter as we continue to take things one day at the time. Who knows, we may not want to admit it, but the old “normal” might not be the lifestyle we want to return to once we realize the value of our new one.

Cindy G. Foust is a wife, mom, author and blogger. You can find her blog at the alphabetmom.com for weekly columns about home life, parenting, small business stories and insight with a smidgen of literacy. Give her a like or follow on Facebook and Instagram.