What it Means to be Flexible

article by Cindy G. Foust

Happy June to my QuaranTEAM community. I hope this month finds each of you safe and healthy as well as your family and friends. Here at the Foust house we are doing what most of you are likely doing, and that’s “phasing” back in to our lives, albeit those lives do seem to be remarkably different than they were just a few months ago. Anybody with me?

When I was trying to decide what I wanted to write about this month, I took a blank sheet of paper out of my printer and laid it on my desk and stared at it for a while (while I simultaneously watched my donkey lay on the ground and roll over on her back… I guess she had an itch). In the early days of my writing, I did this exercise when I wanted to start a book or something that I knew needed to be meaningful or exceptional. Believe it or not, I try to approach each monthly article with that same mentality. Some months are easier than others, but this month felt “off” for me a bit so I thought I might just take it back to my “writing roots” if you would. So there I sat, staring at my single sheet of white paper, watching my donkey and pondering. At some point in that window of time, I picked up my pencil (I still write with a pencil, that I sharpen with my electric sharpener, my old friend who sits on my desk waiting patiently to prepare my writing utensil for my next literary adventure) and I wrote the word “flexible.” Titillating, right? Perhaps it’s not some remarkable and extraordinary word like “grace,” but I think it has some real relevance for the current circumstances we find ourselves in as a community and as a country. I want to rewind for just a moment to that fateful afternoon in mid-March when I got a text from a teacher friend to tell me the kids were dismissing school that day and it would be a “few weeks before they came back.” Or so we thought. I don’t think anyone in the entire world of the nation could have predicted how long these few weeks would actually turn in to.

During this “time,” our lives were suddenly hijacked and we had to become… dare I say it… ”flexible?” I’ll say it because that’s exactly where we found ourselves… in a world where flexibility ruled the roost, to quote Bitsy (my late grandmother for you late coming to the party).

Think about it, readers, in what area of your life did you not need flexibility? Work… schoolwork… grocery shopping…medical appointments…all of it. I’ve read with interest, and complete understanding, different articles and different opinions on the “sheltering in place” opportunities and the joys, and challenges, of being home with your family.

I’m right there with you, let me be the first to say it. I, too, loved being able to have dinner, play cards, listen to music, garden and exercise with my tribe…and I will absolutely cherish this time for the rest of my life. But, as the smoke has begun to clear, some harsh realities outside our home, our safe place, our haven, have started to emerge.

These realities sadly, involve our business friends, the restaurateurs, the magazine owners, the doctor and dental offices, the dance studios, the ones who are having to make difficult decisions on how and when to reemerge into the economic infrastructure. And let me tell you, those decisions are not easy.

My best friend and her mother own a dance studio who has graced the area for 60 years, longer than I’ve been alive. It’s a classic example of the little engine that could and at its helm is an iconic dance teacher who allowed her passion for dance to bring her art form to thousands of fortunate students.

Another good friend owns a restaurant, a restaurant that is nestled on their little parcel of the world and serves muffins and quiches and soups so delicious it will make your tongue slap the roof of your mouth (thank you Big Daddy).

And then there’s my very own editor, who has built this impressive magazine from just a “good idea,” driven from a place of wanting to focus on and support local businesses and artists, the same ones floundering for stability and without a “how-to” book that gives step-by-step instructions on how to right the ship.

I mean, how many pandemics have we had that forced closures or restricted operations? Let me answer that for you…none… or none that we can use as a model or point of reference on how to “restart.” These are just a few of the many, many businesses that have been touched by this unexpected crisis and we all know and love many others who are also suffering.

So how can our families help? How can we use this time as a teaching tool for our kids? What part can we play in helping them dust off the grime and get back to it? Enter the world “flexible.” We can be flexible if we have to read the magazine online rather than in our driveways. We can be flexible when we pick up or have our food delivered and our order is wrong. We can be flexible when dance classes resume or its time for recital. We can be flexible when our doctor or dentist office has you wait in the car until it’s time for your appointment. We can be flexible when a boutique requires you to wear a mask before you enter a store.

We can also show grace in all of these situations, and many other hardship times, particularly in front of our children. They are, after all, your own little prodigies, who can especially learn in this time of “trial and error.”

It’s also okay, readers, if you don’t agree with a business philosophy or decision to return to work, that’s not the purpose of this month’s column. But just because you don’t agree with it doesn’t mean you can’t support their decision. After all, how do we know how we would handle a situation unless we were faced with similar circumstances? Would we walk away from our business… our blood, sweat and tears little empire that is as much as part of our DNA as our molecules or cells? Wait. Is that even a good comparison? Not sure, but you get the picture, right?

These businesses drive our economy and they deserve our support, our patronage, our cheers, even if we don’t think it’s how “we” would do it. No one is ever going to agree on how soon is too soon or how much is too much, so instead, let’s try to imagine what life would be like if these businesses were gone? It’s unthinkable, right? So while the rebuilding and the restructuring and the modifying and the simplifying and the completely rearranging is taking place in the next few months, let’s all exercise some flexibility. And some grace. Tip your waiter a little “heavier.” Donate to a non-profit that you love. Let’s get in behind these valuable, beloved and cherished businesses while they try to make the best of what has happened and do what’s best for the future of their businesses… businesses that have served us well and deserve the chance to continue to do so.

Cindy G. Foust is a wife, mom, author and blogger. You can find her blog at the alphabetmom.com for weekly columns about home life, parenting, small business stories and insight with a smidgen of literacy. Give her a like or follow on Facebook and Instagram.