Simply Lou: Sexiest Man Alive

This month, Lou shares her results from an unofficial poll of who won the “Sexiest Man Alive”

article and illustrations by LOU DAVENPORT

For the last few months I have been thinking about what would make a great column for February, the month when our thoughts turn to love and such. The idea came to me that if People Magazine had an annual issue devoted to “The Sexiest Man Alive,” why couldn’t Bayou Life? And, I would certainly be glad to write it! I don’t have People’s contacts, but, I have Facebook friends and I knew they would be up for an “unofficial poll” of who their favorites were.

First of all, what is “sexy” anyway? It’s an adjective and in the dictionary it is defined as “appealing.” I agree, but, there’s more to it than that. It’s rather subjective because what one person thinks is “sexy” another person may not. There’s a mixture of biological, psychological and experience-based factors. But let’s face it, we go for “looks,” especially when it’s people we have never met.

So, I did a completely unscientific study on Facebook. I asked the question “who is the sexiest man alive” and got some very interesting answers. In fact, the response was so great, I took all the suggestions and put them into categories: actors, athletes and musicians. Paul Newman’s name was mentioned, so I had to amend the “criteria” since I hadn’t thought of any sexy men who had passed away.

I had to rethink Paul completely. My mother loved him, I love him, my daughters love him . . . he crosses generations! This man must have been gorgeous when he was born and just got better until he died at age 83. He received “The Lifetime Achievement Award! And another award for those blue eyes!

Since it’s my column, I did get to choose “The Sexiest Man Alive.” Of course, I chose a man who most are not aware of, someone flying “under the radar.” I picked MIKE ROWE,“Dirty Jobs,” Mike Rowe; “Returning the Favor,” Mike Rowe;” “Mike Rowe WORKS,” Mike Rowe. He’s brawny, handsome, a self professed “smart ass” and he sings opera! He also has a voice that is smooth as silk and doesn’t mind getting dirty. He believes in hard work and set up the Mike Rowe WORKS Foundation to promote trade schools to high school students. Rowe believes college isn’t for everyone but everyone deserves to make a good living, and learning a trade is one of those ways. He travels the country spreading the word.

One of his first jobs was working for QVC in the wee hours. He tells great stories of how and what he would do to stay awake while he “hawked” the goods. He’s from Baltimore, Maryland, and loves his parents. He’s just the total package to me, and mind you, it’s just my opinion.

Actors: Tom Selleck and Sam Elliott were tied. These guys have been around a long time and are still turning heads. Good for them!

We first met TOM SELLECK when he was Thomas Magnum in “Magnum P.I.” driving that red Ferrari and wearing those Hawaiian shirts. Now he is a distinguished police commissioner in “Blue Bloods.”

SAM ELLIOT has been everywhere. He smoldered in “Road House” and showed his wit as “the stranger” in “The Big Lebowski.”

JACK BLACK does a little bit of everything. He sings and has a band, a two man band with his long time friend Kyle, “Tenacious D.” He acts and moves like a gazelle!

Jason Mamoa has lots of great tattoos and he’s Aqua Man.

Adam Driver is mysterious, dark and eyes “blue as ice.” He’s a vampire, you know.

Cole Hauser plays Rip on the TV show “Yellowstone.” Nothing like a fine cowboy.

Kevin Costner stars in “Yellowstone,” too, and he is getting better looking with age.

Matthew McConaughey . . . “Allright, allright, allright.” Is there anything left to say about him?

Chris Pratt was awesome as Andy on “Parks and Rec” but he’s now even greater as Quill the StarLord in all the “Guardians of the Galaxy” movies.

Ryan Reynolds was Van Wilder first and won us over, but now he’s Deadpool. That’s my favorite superhero because I like mine a little on the “inappropriate side!”

Josh Brolin . . . remember the movie, “Goonies?” He was Mikie’s big brother. Now, he is a total tough guy being Cable in “Deadpool” and Thanos in “Gaurdians of the Galaxy.”

Sam Heughan is the “Hot Scot” in “Outlander” and plays Jamie Fraser. He does wear his kilt well.

Jeffrey Dean Morgan has been in “Grey’s Anatomy,” and “The Good Wife.” Now he is having a grand time playing Neagan, the villain with a glorious sense of humor in “Walking Dead.” He gets all the good lines and they are usually bawdy! Such a great “bad boy!”

Chris Helmsworth is the only man who can be Thor.

Travis Fimmel is the hottest Viking to ever raid and pillage a village in “Vikings.” He had the perfect name, too, Ragnor Lothbrook.

Bryan Cranston is the one and only Walter White from “Breaking Bad.”

Matt Damon is the hottie from “Good Will Hunting” and the only Jason Bourne.

Brad Pitt is that kind of handsome that doesn’t seem to even know he’s handsome.

Leonardo DiCaprio who we’ve watched grow up is a great actor and even more, he’s such an environmentalist.

Joe Manganiello had one of his roles in “Magic Mike” which put him on the list.

Taylor Kinney plays Kelly Severied on “Chicago Fire.” He pretty much sets the TV on fire.

Sean Connery was the first James Bond. I still think he was the best. He’s 88 years old now and still knows how to wear his kilt. He’s headed for a “Lifetime Achievement Award.”

Sir Anthony Hopkins is just so interesting and smart and can play anybody.

Sir Patrick Stewart is Jean Luc Picard, and he’s a great comedian, too!

Denzel Washington, I have never seen a bad movie that has Denzel Washington in it. He’s all round good.

Bill Murray is who I saved for last. A sense of humor is a powerful thing and Bill has “it.” Watch “What About Bob?” and if you don’t laugh, get to an emergency room fast!

Musicians: This is a controversial choice, but, I still think Keith Richards is sexy in his own special way. I didn’t think that when he was young but now that he has all those years and miles on him, he’s great! He’s been rockin’ for over 50 years and just seems to get better. Did you know he lives a quiet life in Connecticut? And, how many 75 year olds can wear eyeliner and carry it off?

Eric Church, Blake Shelton, Jon Pardi, Chris Stapleton are all new country musicians, all talented in their own way and very good looking, too.

Alan Jackson, Sammy Kershaw, Dwight Yoakum, and George Straight are an older group of great country musicians. They just keep on doing what they do best. George Straight never ages and I do wonder how Dwight Yoakum gets into those tight leather pants. Don’t you?

Athletes: Joe Burrow, that kid, oh, that kid! Who couldn’t love this kid? What determination, skill, heart and soul he brings to the game. He’s going to go far and we will all cheer him all the way.

Coach O is one of the most dynamic men I’ve ever seen. He has the biggest heart and he sure doesn’t mind showing that side of himself. I wonder if he realizes how much love he’s brought to LSU football?

Drew Brees, Alvin Kamara, Sean Payton….oh, the whole Saints and LSU football teams. What a year they have all given us. That qualifies all of them for this column!

Honorable mentions. There are a lot of them and I cannot leave them out. They were suggested and that means somebody noticed they had that “certain something” that makes them sexy and memorable.

Jon Hamm, Tyson Beckford, Paul Rudd, David Letterman (without the beard), Shemar Moore, Jimmy Smits, Jeff Goldblum, Robert Downey Jr., Norman Reedus, Chris Isaak, Joaquin Phoenix, Harry Connick Jr., Micheal Buble’ and the one and only, Stone Cold Steve Austin.

So, there seems to be a lot of conventionally good looking men on this “unofficial” listing but, there’s also a lot of men whose looks would be considered “outside of the box.” It just proves “beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” It’s been a fun column to write and I want to thank all my Facebook friends who gave me a wide and varied list of suggestions for “The Sexiest Man Alive!”

Mike Rowe believes “there simply needs to be a world in which people laugh.” He adds, “ the kinder and gentler way of communication that used to be the norm, now isn’t.” We can change that! Let’s be kind to one another and most of all, let’s laugh!

This column is dedicated to my Mama . . . she really loved Paul Newman and taught me to appreciate beauty in all things.