Bayou-kidZ: Empowering Our Children

Providing the Necessary Resources and Encouragement for Our Kids

article by Cindy G. Foust

Happy spring to you BayouLife community on what is a cloudy, warm muggy day in February. That’s right, it’s 68 degrees with an absolute zero chance of winter precipitation. I swear, the mosquitoes will be the size of a crop duster if we don’t get some cold weather soon, or at least that’s what Bitsy used to say.

Despite the somewhat confused and awkward climate in our region, I hope things are going well for each of you and your families. We are about to embark on an interesting month here at BayouLife, with all the talk of women empowerment and such. I’m not all together sure how I morphed from crop dusters to strong women, I think I’m just talented like that, but here we are, talking about a subject that seems to have a lot of movement in this country.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t plan to branch off into the #MeToo movement…wrong column for that, but honestly, it took some mad bravery and “empowerment” for those women to come forward and take a stand, right? That bravery had to come from somewhere.

I was having a texting conversation (isn’t it a shame that’s how we communicate these days?) with my good friend, Melanie, just last night, about helping our children find “their place” and trying to help them cultivate a strong self-esteem. I write often that parenting is not for the faint of heart, and in fact, is on my top five list of the hardest things I’ve ever done. This is one of those instances that reminds me of that. Melanie has a daughter, who has begun to blossom, albeit a little later than her older sister, but she is beginning to find her “place,” her “niche,” her “confidence.” After trying many different things, her daughter finally feels “empowered” (I’m really liking this word) of all the places, on the back of a horse. Melanie sent me videos of a child who has always been timid, a little shy and reserved, sitting proudly on the back of her horse, beaming from ear to ear.

It’s a sigh of relief, really, for a parent, for you have helped “empower” your child. Surely, we’ve all felt it at some time or the other…a time when we see our children take mental ownership of a situation or really sink their teeth into something they are good at.

I know this column kind of started out about empowering women (well, in the case of Bayou-kidZ, children), but honestly, my conscious just wouldn’t let me write to “just girls.”

For you see, I’ve been that parent of a boy, too, who is now a nearly 21-year-old man, but who struggled with self-esteem for years. He grew into a confident young man, thank the Lord, as my dear friend Mrs. Barbara Harkey used to say, because of “dumb luck.”

Well, and the village…we all have a village, right? And if you don’t have one, you need to find you one. But that’s another column for another month.

But there were some tough times during those elementary school years, before my baby had braces or when he had the most precious red curly hair, that he didn’t seem to think was so precious. We made it through, thankfully, but, alas, I also have a seventh grader…and she is a girl and let me tell you, if you have one of each you know what I’m talking about when I say, raising a boy is vastly different from raising a girl. But that’s also another column for another day, too.

So, finding those moments like Melanie had this week, where you can give your child the chance to be in control of a situation or feel really confident and self-assured at what they are doing, are few and far between, so we have to be looking for them, readers. Every child is different and they deserve the opportunity to find their “thing;” that “thing” that they want to immerse themselves in and work to be the best they can be.

Listen, no one struggled with that more than me when my little girl came into this world wearing a tutu and a tiara. I couldn’t even spell tiara! And I sure as heck couldn’t make a bun that didn’t look like a door knob, but off to dance class we went. Even though I envisioned her with a t-ball glove and a miniature basketball (she has humored me and plays that, too, but not with the same robustness that she dances), she had other interests and another love, different than the one I wanted for her.

Our children get only one chance at being a child, at being able to savor those idyllic years. Giving them the resources they need or the encouragement they deserve, to purse their dreams “empowers” them. For there are few people they want to please more than their parents, their families, their village.

By the way, I looked up the word “empower” at dictionary.com and you won’t believe what their definition said…“Empower means “give power or authority to.” When you educate children and believe in them, you empower those kids to go after their dreams.” Oh, really? What compelling thoughts, readers, when we educate and believe in our children, we give them power and authority to go after their dreams. Key words, of course, being “their dreams” and not ours…also another topic for another column (man, I am going to be busy writing some very compelling columns over the next few months when you thought I was going to be writing 101 ways to get rid of mosquitoes the size of a Buick.)

So, where we at, readers? Any of this sound familiar to you, too? I would suspect that it does and good grief is it a slippery slope most of the time. I, myself, wanted to be a southern gospel singer, and really envisioned that I could be. But my parents could hear me belting it out in my room to I’ll Fly Away and did their best parenting job at deterring me from having a solo concert at my church. Yes, that was excellent parenting skills I would say.
So, get those parenting bifocals on, friends, and give your kids the power to be who and what they want to be. You know they can, right? And girls, if we are speaking to the female persuasion this month, girls can do anything they want.

My friend Staci Mitchell is mayor. My friend Cassie Livingston is editor of this wonderful magazine. My friend Carrie Underwood won American Idol and is a successful country music singer. Well, she’s not really my friend, like we don’t text and stuff, but I think she would like me if she knew me.
So, listen to me very carefully parents, put your weight behind your kids and keep it there and watch them grow and flourish and spread their wings. Your belief in their dream is all it takes to empower them to become who they are destined to be.